Monday, February 7, 2011

They, in country like india


A

woman needs all that she finds inevitable for survival, money, sex, love and the list can be drawn on if the man writing this is hostile to this sex , in particular. But given that I am a person with lukewarm attitude to every take of life, I can not afford myself to wobble to either of the sides of the extremities. Therefore to me, their needs are confined to something (or somebody) that loves them and/or is loved by them. As by survival I meant living the Life more like a human, not ghoulishly (as the majority in country like India have not yet experienced), I vouch for only Love which can sustain a woman indefinitely in good health and mind. Their soul is quite humane. Their love is much above lust, their craving for good clothes, ornaments is to decorate themselves painstakingly as they love to do so, as they love themselves, as they love to see themselves beautiful before the mirror, not only with the objective of alluring men (at least, not always) as we, The Men see it.

But here in country like India, they are left as a pitiable mass at the mercy of the men. They have not yet tasted the fundamental rights guaranteed by the constitution, protected by the Supreme court and is supposed to be applicable with equality more than based on sex. Here, ironically a retired man beat the sh*t out of his wife just to vent out the frustration conferred upon him by the ignominy of his workless days or (it can be put in this way altogether) to seek a way, a change out of his boredom. And our women with their age old nature of boastful endurance give in to their outrage, making themselves as an object of tension reliever of their maleficent husbands. A child watching this ,with dismay and grief initially, are enticed by this manly cruelty of his father later on in his life, growing to be an exact replica of the man and if the child is a girl, she is taught this incident as a microcosm of our Indian culture and is warned of ever challenging or even attempting to alter this unbending fate of the system(or culture, as they would name it), and thus growing to be another rheumy-eyed woman who would take pride in not feeling indignant to his man’s willfulness. Therefore, a woman here does not survive, she lives, lives on the leftovers of life, on the advice of neighbors, on the income of her husband and on the wants of her in-laws and her children. Among the most urbanite of us, woman who survives on their own remuneration are seen resentfully by society (that includes other women too, who sympathetically rubs her knees during her misfortune and gloats over her loses!).

As veteran writer Varsha Dixit observes, the good life of a woman in her in-laws is grounded on the good nature of her which is defined by the parameters : the 3 ‘S’s : sweep, serve, smile woman’s status in country like India can easily be fathomed.

Yesterday an Uncle and Aunt came with an invitation to their son’s wedding. When asked about the bride, the aunt replied, grimacing, that the girl has a private job offer of minimum 8 hrs. of work and unfortunately the girl is bent upon pursuing the job. Coupled with the fact (that my uncle and aunt despised) that this is going to be a love marriage, they are certain about their deprivation of the 1st and 2nd ‘S’s. and hence I could foretell the 3rd ‘S’ would wither away from within the girl’s life very soon as a fall out of her in laws resentment for having diddled them out of a life time opportunity of a free service.

I, unambiguously, advocate that women empowerment is only possible in country like India if the gen X changes their attitude towards this section of the society as they must realize a part is never complete without another part. Unconsummated love can never give birth to you. So how does being a man make you supreme and superior to the other sex when you are not at the liberty of creating yourself or with the people from your sex? Seat reservation in assemblies seriously not going to help. They need to feel the freedom as we do,unequivocally.